Relations, full of love and mutual understanding, often seem only a fairy tale to us. However, each of us can love and be loved and create such harmony in life.
It is sad to hear such things from a girl or a young man: “I do not want a family because in the beginning all is good, and then people quarrel and get divorced. Also there is no guarantee that I will develop in another way”. Parental mutual relations form a basis of children’s perception of love. If in house people often talk on raised tones, and even shout, if a child constantly hears angry voices, he will consider it as quite admissible style of dialogue between loving people. The ones, grown in such atmosphere, later have difficulties to build normal relations in own family. Someone repeats parental scenario: lives in constant conflicts. Others - cannot stand and get divorced, but, establishing a new family, make same mistakes. Third - live in loneliness, being afraid of insults and afflictions.
All wish to love and be loved, have a happy family, reliable back. But only those who remember golden laws of love can succeed.
The trust law
Vick was nervous, when her husband was late on work. It seemed her that only other woman could be a reason. Therefore Vick listened to telephone conversations of her spouse, arranged interrogations. Jack also treated his wife’s attempts to go on aerobics or to a cosmetician very jealously. He read her diary, studied handbag contents.
In this family the trust credit is settled for a long time. For truly love matrimonial relations trust is vital. Without it one person becomes suspicious, disturbing, and other - gets to an emotional trap: it seems to him that freedom is lost. Therefore learn to trust not only your loved one, but also your relations.
The law of sincere dialogue
Christina and Matt are married for three years. First they had both love, and passion. But a year passed, and relations became usual: Christina often took offence at her husband, as he did not guess her desires (after all she loved roses, instead of carnations); she was irritated that Matt flirted to her, when she was occupied. But Christina never told her husband about these things, and he could not understand the reasons of her insults in any way.
It is a widespread mistake among a newly-married couples: it seems to them love is enough for happy life. But love is not an artificial flower requiring no care. It as a live plant - it can blossom, and wither. All depends on how we cherish it. Sincere dialogue for love is like water for a plant - without it it cannot survive. Speak to each other about feelings and desires. Necessarily tell about how you love and appreciate your husband (wife) - do not be afraid to overpraise. Also do not accept good relation to yourself as something self-evident. Thank!
The donation law
Lilly always had high requirements to men. She wanted a loving, careful, gentle, passionate husband, with apartment, car, etc. She never reflected: what she can present to her elect. She said: “If he loves me, then I will care of him too”. However, Lilly is still lonely, recently she became 35.
To meet a true love, it is necessary to present a part of yourself sincerely and disinterestedly at first. If you wish to receive love, you need to give it. And the more you give, the more you receive. Love is like a boomerang - it will necessarily come back. Also remember: your stock of love is unlimited. And the unique way to lose love - is not to give it to other people.
However, a problem is that many do not wish to give the first, they love with reservations: “I will love you, only if you love me”. Wait, while someone will make the first step. It is all the same as a musician will tell: “I will play, after visitors will start dancing”. The True love demands nothing in exchange.
The law of touches
Dan and Mina shared duties among themselves accurately. Mina cooked, washed, cleaned. Dan earned money. They talked only about everyday life. Sex was arranged strictly according a schedule - no off-schedule embraces and touches. However, at the beginning Dan tried to flirt with his wife at inopportune moments, but she stopped it. As it was found out later, in childhood Mina never played fool with parents; embraces also were not accepted in her family.
Touch is one of the strongest displays of love. It destroys barriers and strengthens mutual relations. For restoration of normal atmosphere in a family psychological practice even recommends special training: embrace your partner more often, without sexual motive; play pranks, like children; hold hands on public, like young enamoured. By the way, “pupils” say this is the most difficult homework in their life.
In one of London clinics they made an experiment. In the evening, on the eve of operation, a surgeon usually visited his patient to tell about forthcoming event in general and answer questions interesting a patient. A doctor held a patient’s hand during conversation. And so, such patient recovered 3 times faster than others.
When you touch someone carefully, your physiology also changes: level of stress hormones decreases, nervous system relaxes, immunity becomes stronger, emotional condition improves. Wise people say: if you do not embrace 7-8 persons for a day, you are doomed to illnesses.
Freedom law
Natasha and Steve married recently. All was fine. But after a while Natalia felt that her husband tried to operate her: imposed his opinion, made decisions for her. If she acted in her own way, he was very angry. But Natasha considers she is an adult person and is free to make decisions independently.
If you love a person, give him freedom. A freedom in choosing, freedom to live how he wants, instead of how you want. Certainly, it is hard. But there is no other way out. Not to feel in a trap, everyone needs personal space.
